Ok, I am a fan of Mr. Tyler Perry. I enjoy his work and I don’t care what his sexual orientation happens to be.
See, Madea reminds me a lot of this lady named Miss Mary I knew growing up. She was a gun packing woman who took no stuff from anyone, husband included. She actually went down to his job and shot at him. She told the story while he sat there and cosigned it. Did he deserve her anger? Yes. Did he deserve to get shot at? Evidently he thought so becuz he bailed her out of jail after she was arrested for shooting at him. *chuckle*
There is just so much in his plays and movies that I can identify with. I just find it amazing that so many black people have had the Cosby Show family upbringing that is totally foreign to me outside of movies, books and tv. I think it’s great for them and that the world has changed so much that some black folk had that great American upbringing. But why do they feel the need to hate on those of us that didn’t grow up like that? Neither me nor those raised like me are hating on them. Maybe Wonderbread land wasn’t as great as we thought it was. All that glitters is not gold, I guess.
Why does any of this even matter to me? What is the point of this? Well, I find it amusing and interesting that so many people have a problem with Tyler Perry and his niche audience of mainly black American women. Folk have a problem with him yet no one is trying to copy his success.
See, in 2008 while most of the world’s financial markets were losing their shirts, pants, shoes, socks and undershirts Tyler Perry made $100,000,000. Yeah, I could have typed $100 million but all those zeros make the point so much better. *shrug* At least I think so.
See, while everyone is trying to figure what is wrong with black women, Tyler figured out what was right with us instead. He figured out what was right first and then did a back end run on what was wrong. It was ingenious. All I can do is applaud him.
See, we may be his niche but his niche has made him to date over $200,000,000 while everyone else is still trying to find their financial footing.
Tyler Perry even made a movie that should have appeased black men. Daddy’s Little Girls. It was his lowest grossing moving to date. *chuckle* If the fellas really wanted to make a statement to the effect that there are still a lot of great black men out here who step up to the plate and handle their affairs like adults then they should have flocked to the movie and bought the DVD, legally.
Why didn’t black women flock to the movie and buy the DVD? I can’t speak for all of us but I know that I just don’t see enough black men like Idris’ character in my real world. *shrug* It is what it is.
Anyhoodles, all this disparaging talk about TP and his niche audience, we sure got a lot of money for some bitter evil heffas in this here niche, got me thinking. First, good thing for him bitter evil heifers control so much money and we ain't stingy. Second, the media and everyone else seems to talk about what’s wrong with us so much lately it made me wonder. I mean, what is the real problem?
Stepping back and looking at everyone else pointing fingers at us I began to wonder what is the question that folk are really asking?
I mean…look at the facts:
43% of black women are unmarried. The article and numbers are from 2008. I expect that number to increase after the 2010 census results are in.
Black women number at less than 10% of the population of the US yet we lead the numbers in newly reported cases of HIV/AIDS. AIDS & HIV Statistics as of 2008
We are reported to be bitter, evil, uppity, etc so our own men don’t want us. At least to hear the media tell it. Google or Bing it.
An unreported number of black men are on the down low (homosexual but refuse to admit it).
Most of the time we are saddled with raising our children on our own with little or no emotional or financial support.
We have poor health. We are more likely than white women to die of breast cancer, colon cancer, and uterine cancer. Not to mention other treatable illnesses.
We are malnourished. When you work for a living you eat what is cheap and fast. Cheap and fast almost always equals bad for you.
Then we have all the same problems that all the finger pointers have: overworked, severely underpaid, underappreciated, under loved, under sexed, sleep deprived… *pauses to flex fingers* Yeah, I could go on but I think I made my point.
When I take all that into consideration I guess I get what people are really asking: Why the fuk haven’t black women cracked the fuk up like the rest of us?
Cuz see, we do have our crackheads, prostitutes, strippers, unwed mothers, thieves, con-artists, and just plain criminals, abused women, and some dummies among us. We still don’t get pissed becuz we got passed over for a promotion and piss in the coffee pot.
We don’t sexually molest one of our Sunday school students, kill her and stuff her in a suitcase (Sandra Cantu). We don’t decide to kill our significant other, set fire to their home and our home and then go out to a deserted parking lot, call 911 and tell them all about it before we commit suicide. We don't even know why.
We don’t decide to walk into a gym and kill the opposite sex becuz we feel rejected by every one of them link. I read his blog before it was taken down. Wow. No where in there does he say to himself that perhaps he should take some of his estimated quarter of million dollars net worth and seek professional help. *smh*
We don’t decide to kill our ex but first let’s kill a bunch of other people that have nothing to do with us DC Snipers.
We don’t barricade ourselves in a home for days and days and days cuz our ex broke up with us, but first we kill her neighbors who try to help. Joe Palczynski
We don’t strap our children into their car seats and push the car into a lake. (Susan Smith)
We don’t fake our own kidnapping to get out of wedding. Real life runaway bride.
Those of us in the public eye ain’t whoring ourselves out to any dyck that wants a ride while being married to someone else. I ain’t even gonna link this cuz there are too many men who have been outed recently to pick one.
We don’t go off the deep end and kill the man who has been lying to us about leaving his wife for us and then commit suicide. Link I mean for real y’all? Those two have become verbs. i.e. Man, I am going to dump this chick before she goes Kazemi on me and I end up McNaired! *smh*
We don’t even feel the need to announce to the world that we have a prejudiced coochay. *shrug*
We don’t do a lot of things that all the finger pointers seem to be doing. Yet the finger pointers seem to have a lot more trouble coping with their problems than we bitter, evil, unmarried, unloved black women. Makes me wonder, what is it that the finger pointers are doing wrong?
Maybe that is the question that the finger pointers should be focusing on.
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Thursday, July 15, 2010
One more thing about black women
While some men, black and otherwise, were kings I think people have completely forgetten that in many cultures kings took many wives/concubines whatever you want to call them. So there were/are far more women with claims to the royal treatment than men. Maybe that is why so many of us black women are "uppity".
Man! I guess we'll have to wait for the rest of the world to catch up to us...
Man! I guess we'll have to wait for the rest of the world to catch up to us...
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
On Dating Black Women, yet again. *sigh*
There seems to be this communication block between black men and black women. It’s like we say something and they hear something else. Then they say something and we hear something completely different. It’s like we are each hearing our inadequacies coming out of the other’s mouth and no matter what is said to the contrary that is all we hear or recognize.
What got me on this train of thought was the recent statement by Slim Thug (ST). If you are oblivious to him and what he said that enraged so many check this link here Slim Thug's take on Black Women. Truthfully, I was oblivious to his existence until my Twitter timeline (TT) exploded with angry tweets directed at him.
Anyhoodles, I’ve already done my post on what I think of men who proclaim to the world that they don’t date black women for xyz reasons On Dating Black Women. So really, I didn’t pay him much mind after I found out he fell into that category. I read his blurb without emotion. Actually it struck me within the first few sentences that perhaps he had tried to approach a black woman in a socio-economic, educational background that was much higher than his own and he had been shot down. I figured that was his issue and blew him off and moved onto the next topic.
But then I really started to think on what he had said and realized that perhaps there was another way to take what he had said. Cuz though I didn’t get emotional about it A LOT of people did. Just three below.
Miss Jia Miss Jia's thoughts on ST.
Shamontiel Shamontiel's Response.
Marc Lamont Hill Response.
I imagine there are more but again, I don’t think that topic deserves that much of my time. Cuz as I see it the problem isn’t just black centric it’s people centric. Over half of US marriages end in divorce. Since 70% or more of black women are unmarried that means that everyone else is having just as many problems keeping a mate as black women are having finding one.
As the government keeps telling the world black folk only make up 12% of the USA. Black women are a little more than half of that 12%. So in reality it would seem that more non-black folk are having a hard time keeping a mate than we are finding one. Given the difficulties associated with the break up and dissolution of a marriage, perhaps that ain’t as bad a thing as people try to make it sound. Just my humble opinion.
Japanese women have surpassed their men in education and therefore in the job marketplace. They are making more, smarter and are putting aside the traditional female roles in Japanese society. In other words, they are refusing to take a backseat to a man when they are working just as hard and making just as much money if not more than their mate. They’d rather do without a mate. They are facing a crisis becuz when you think that way, you don’t have any babies. Soon, there won’t be enough young people to keep up the infrastructure. They are advising Japanese women to do the same thing that ST seems to be advising black women.
Lower your standards when it comes to getting a black man as your mate.
*sigh* I really don’t want to and I really don’t see why I should have to. I hear so many black men telling anyone who will listen that ‘We use to be kings and queens.’ Um, if you knew your history you would know not everyone was a king or queen. SOME of us come from royalty. Just some. Take it down a few thousand guys cuz the way most of you sound I don’t feel any royalty coming off you. *shrug*
A look at the histories in many Caucasian cultures (cuz that’s all I got right now) shows that in the past it was not unusual for a woman to marry beneath her station and vice versa and look what Caucasian folk have achieved, world dominance. Yes, I know how and I ain’t here to discuss this on this post. If we could have done it we would have so I’m not going there right now…if ever.
Caucasian folk often married (marry) different classes to form powerful alliances via money, land, etc. Governments were sometimes built and/or destroyed just due to the right or wrong marital alliances. There was always something to be gained by such alliances.
See I can see another way to look at what ST is saying. Right now there doesn’t seem to be that many successful black men out there. Of those that are successful, some are openingly gay, some are confirmed bachelors, and some are seeking exotic women. It’s a mess out here.
As usual, the onus is being put on black women to continue the black race…by any means necessary. That means marrying someone not as educated, not as cultured, not as refined, not as wise (if you got more than 2 kids with more than 1 baby momma you ain’t too wise in my book), not as articulate and perhaps not even as ambitious. That means knowing that you can run circles around this man in every way possible and still respecting him enough to take the backseat and let him be the head of the household even though your income is the reason the household exists. In essence taking the backseat to a man who didn’t have the sense to try to take the same law abiding road out of poverty that you did. *nervous system attempts to shut down*
I can’t do it. I tried. He got on my last gotdamned nerve.
For those who have more patience and are not quite as spoiled as my simple azz is you are undertaking a wonderful thing for the future.
Basically, as I look at it, what ST might be saying is that black women are going to have put aside our wants and expectations and accept the black men who are available as they are. You, who can do it, will have to marry and/or have children and raise up the children in hopes that the next generation will benefit from your sacrifice. Each generation of black women will have to refine and refine each generation of black men until there actually are a lot of good black men.
In other words, y’all gonna have to be strong black women again.
For those of you who undertake this cause please make note of the following numbers becuz some of you are going to need them:
Alcoholics Anonymous (212) 870-3400
Narcotics Anonymous (818) 773-9999
Gamblers Anonymous (213) 386-8789
House of Ruth 909-988-5559
Suicide Prevention Hotline 1-800-273-TALK (ooooh a toll free number they mean business)
It’s not going to be easy trying to uplift the black man, mostly on your own and without him knowing it too. You will more than likely never get the credit for it but in the end it will be worth it. Again, I salute you who choose this unselfish, self-sacrificing path.
Good luck with that.
*opens sex toys website*
What got me on this train of thought was the recent statement by Slim Thug (ST). If you are oblivious to him and what he said that enraged so many check this link here Slim Thug's take on Black Women. Truthfully, I was oblivious to his existence until my Twitter timeline (TT) exploded with angry tweets directed at him.
Anyhoodles, I’ve already done my post on what I think of men who proclaim to the world that they don’t date black women for xyz reasons On Dating Black Women. So really, I didn’t pay him much mind after I found out he fell into that category. I read his blurb without emotion. Actually it struck me within the first few sentences that perhaps he had tried to approach a black woman in a socio-economic, educational background that was much higher than his own and he had been shot down. I figured that was his issue and blew him off and moved onto the next topic.
But then I really started to think on what he had said and realized that perhaps there was another way to take what he had said. Cuz though I didn’t get emotional about it A LOT of people did. Just three below.
Miss Jia Miss Jia's thoughts on ST.
Shamontiel Shamontiel's Response.
Marc Lamont Hill Response.
I imagine there are more but again, I don’t think that topic deserves that much of my time. Cuz as I see it the problem isn’t just black centric it’s people centric. Over half of US marriages end in divorce. Since 70% or more of black women are unmarried that means that everyone else is having just as many problems keeping a mate as black women are having finding one.
As the government keeps telling the world black folk only make up 12% of the USA. Black women are a little more than half of that 12%. So in reality it would seem that more non-black folk are having a hard time keeping a mate than we are finding one. Given the difficulties associated with the break up and dissolution of a marriage, perhaps that ain’t as bad a thing as people try to make it sound. Just my humble opinion.
Japanese women have surpassed their men in education and therefore in the job marketplace. They are making more, smarter and are putting aside the traditional female roles in Japanese society. In other words, they are refusing to take a backseat to a man when they are working just as hard and making just as much money if not more than their mate. They’d rather do without a mate. They are facing a crisis becuz when you think that way, you don’t have any babies. Soon, there won’t be enough young people to keep up the infrastructure. They are advising Japanese women to do the same thing that ST seems to be advising black women.
Lower your standards when it comes to getting a black man as your mate.
*sigh* I really don’t want to and I really don’t see why I should have to. I hear so many black men telling anyone who will listen that ‘We use to be kings and queens.’ Um, if you knew your history you would know not everyone was a king or queen. SOME of us come from royalty. Just some. Take it down a few thousand guys cuz the way most of you sound I don’t feel any royalty coming off you. *shrug*
A look at the histories in many Caucasian cultures (cuz that’s all I got right now) shows that in the past it was not unusual for a woman to marry beneath her station and vice versa and look what Caucasian folk have achieved, world dominance. Yes, I know how and I ain’t here to discuss this on this post. If we could have done it we would have so I’m not going there right now…if ever.
Caucasian folk often married (marry) different classes to form powerful alliances via money, land, etc. Governments were sometimes built and/or destroyed just due to the right or wrong marital alliances. There was always something to be gained by such alliances.
See I can see another way to look at what ST is saying. Right now there doesn’t seem to be that many successful black men out there. Of those that are successful, some are openingly gay, some are confirmed bachelors, and some are seeking exotic women. It’s a mess out here.
As usual, the onus is being put on black women to continue the black race…by any means necessary. That means marrying someone not as educated, not as cultured, not as refined, not as wise (if you got more than 2 kids with more than 1 baby momma you ain’t too wise in my book), not as articulate and perhaps not even as ambitious. That means knowing that you can run circles around this man in every way possible and still respecting him enough to take the backseat and let him be the head of the household even though your income is the reason the household exists. In essence taking the backseat to a man who didn’t have the sense to try to take the same law abiding road out of poverty that you did. *nervous system attempts to shut down*
I can’t do it. I tried. He got on my last gotdamned nerve.
For those who have more patience and are not quite as spoiled as my simple azz is you are undertaking a wonderful thing for the future.
Basically, as I look at it, what ST might be saying is that black women are going to have put aside our wants and expectations and accept the black men who are available as they are. You, who can do it, will have to marry and/or have children and raise up the children in hopes that the next generation will benefit from your sacrifice. Each generation of black women will have to refine and refine each generation of black men until there actually are a lot of good black men.
In other words, y’all gonna have to be strong black women again.
For those of you who undertake this cause please make note of the following numbers becuz some of you are going to need them:
Alcoholics Anonymous (212) 870-3400
Narcotics Anonymous (818) 773-9999
Gamblers Anonymous (213) 386-8789
House of Ruth 909-988-5559
Suicide Prevention Hotline 1-800-273-TALK (ooooh a toll free number they mean business)
It’s not going to be easy trying to uplift the black man, mostly on your own and without him knowing it too. You will more than likely never get the credit for it but in the end it will be worth it. Again, I salute you who choose this unselfish, self-sacrificing path.
Good luck with that.
*opens sex toys website*
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Time to get focused.
I had an epiphany moment a few days ago. I was relaxing, looking at my tt and laughing at the shenanigans there. I was trying to decide which one of the other online blogs I was going to check out next when a thought occurred to me. A question really.
Where would I be if Twitter and x, y, z blogs had existed back when I was still an administrative assistant? The answer came swiftly. I would still be sitting in that spot, unhappy, still an admin, underpaid and at a dead end in my career.
*shudder* That realization shook me. The words blurred on the screen as I remembered were I had worked my way up from. What if I was still there? It gave me a start.
You see before Twitter and the other online spots I like to chat in came into being I spent my lunch hour and evenings job hunting. Looking for my next challenge. I don’t do that now and I’m beginning to feel the effects of my change in habits.
Now I will get started again. Everyone needs a little play time. I’ve played enough on this level. I wanna play with some new people in some new places who think. Yeah that’s it. People who actually just think for a change instead of having thoughts and ideas given to them.
I still got a couple blog posts to finish. I’ll try to get to them if I need a diversion. Somehow, I don’t think I will need a diversion. I have things to do. However, I would like to finish them and post them. My notes to a future me.
*smiles at something that I can’t quite explain*
Where would I be if Twitter and x, y, z blogs had existed back when I was still an administrative assistant? The answer came swiftly. I would still be sitting in that spot, unhappy, still an admin, underpaid and at a dead end in my career.
*shudder* That realization shook me. The words blurred on the screen as I remembered were I had worked my way up from. What if I was still there? It gave me a start.
You see before Twitter and the other online spots I like to chat in came into being I spent my lunch hour and evenings job hunting. Looking for my next challenge. I don’t do that now and I’m beginning to feel the effects of my change in habits.
Now I will get started again. Everyone needs a little play time. I’ve played enough on this level. I wanna play with some new people in some new places who think. Yeah that’s it. People who actually just think for a change instead of having thoughts and ideas given to them.
I still got a couple blog posts to finish. I’ll try to get to them if I need a diversion. Somehow, I don’t think I will need a diversion. I have things to do. However, I would like to finish them and post them. My notes to a future me.
*smiles at something that I can’t quite explain*
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