Friday, March 4, 2011

Just an update

So I haven’t been around for a few months. That is because there is so much going on *pause* around me personally. A lot going on with me professionally. It is so crazy. I don’t even know where to begin. I guess I’ll start with my GFN.


*chuckle*

Much as I thought she would, she filed for divorce in October 2010 from her husband. That’s pretty sad, I think. He’s a decent guy. Perfect? No, but then neither is she nor me nor anyone else. I kind of started a bit of a family stink several months back by telling her what I thought her problem was.

*rolls eyes*

Aye yi yi! I wish I had kept my mouth shut. I was just trying to get her to go back to couples counseling with him. Seriously, when you have a black man who wants to go to couples counseling and work on the marriage you got somebody worth building a life with. But all she kept hearing was that I didn’t think she knew how to take care of a man.

*blink blink* I have the emails to back up the fact I never said anything to that effect. Fact of the matter, according to her mother Sissy, is that she is seeing another man. *sigh* I’m done with it and moving on. Her life not mine. *smh* But that ain’t the way to a happy life. I guess she’ll have to learn the hard way like everyone else who takes that route.

My BFL’s daughter is trying to get divorced from her husband. I say trying because he refuses to sign the divorce papers even though she moved out May 2010 and he has moved in with his new girlfriend. *smh* Why hold onto somebody who a) doesn’t want you and b) you don’t want? The BFL’s daughter has moved back home to get back on her feet financially. She then totaled her new car. Then she got pregnant by her new boyfriend who her father doesn’t like. *sigh* Youth. Then she lost the baby a couple weeks ago. She is taking it pretty hard which in turn means my BFL is taking it hard with her. It is hard for any parent to see their child suffer regardless of the circumstances.

MB3’s sister has stage 4 cancer. Man, the hits just keep coming. I worry what will happen to the foster daughter she has had since she was a baby. So sad.

Meanwhile, MB3’s daughter is still unemployed and looking to her to support her, the boyfriend and his two sons, and her two daughters. And she’s doing it though not in the smartest of ways. I’ve tried telling her, hinting at her, pointing her in the right direction but she always says she can’t this, that, and the other. MB3 has two homes. One she owns outright and another she is paying a mortgage on and has been in it over 20 years.

I told her she should have her daughter get on Section 8, since her lazy azz won’t keep a job, and rent the house she still owes a mortgage on. The rent she will get from Section 8 will pay her mortgage and then some. The house she owns outright she could rent out as a group home for the mentally challenged. She could use the properties as collateral for a home loan and get the condo she has always wanted. The money she would get from the group home should pay the mortgage on the condo thus freeing up her salary to do with as she pleases.

Do you know what she said to me when I laid that plan out for her? She said she didn’t know she could do that. I said yes, that she should go talk to a real estate lawyer to work that out. She responded real quick she didn’t have money for that then went out and bought matching outfits for her and her granddaughters.

*blink pause blink*

Those outfits were the cost of an hour of a real estate lawyer’s time. *sigh* Now she sending out emails talking about telling people she is sewing pillows to make extra money. I replied ok. *sucks teeth*

Next up is MCB. *brief sunny smile* She got my godson off to his first year in college. He did well his first semester. Above a 3.0 on a 4.0 scale for his first semester and HE is disappointed that he didn’t do better. *smiling hard* I pray he keeps up the good work. His father however is another problem. *rolls eyes* I can’t stand that man but I ain’t got to sleep next to him so…whatever. He’s said he wants to contribute to his son’s college education and participate in more of his special events and blah blah blah. In other words, be involved with him now that he is over 18 when he couldn’t be bothered before. My godson is not stupid. It is causing familial upset. His son doesn’t want to be bothered but MCB would welcome some help with his college tuition. She’s walking a tightrope of sorts between the two of them.

Then the problems she’s been having on her job, that I told her to leave 5 years ago, are escalating. And she is another one that can’t say no to family. So she’s cosigned on a couple things she shouldn’t have. *smh* And she’s looking after an elderly uncle. She hasn’t talked about the guy she’s been seeing in awhile and I ain’t asking. Just what I mentioned above is more than an earful every time I hear from her.

Then I got these folk on the job. Ugh is all I can say. One thing I have learned on this job is the importance of being meticulous about keeping records. I swear almost on a daily basis they try to say they didn’t do something or didn’t know and then I have to point out the whens, wheres and whos of how they got the info on the right way to do something. Then they go away until they mess something else up.

*groan* Will I ever get to work with people who are adults on the inside as well as on the outside? I wonder what that is like.

I did do one very smart thing last spring. I let my hair go natural. *big smile* It took a minute for my hair to get the hang of it and it still needs some TLC but I am quite happy with the results.

One Sunday after washing my hair, I grabbed my blow dryer and all the gunk that goes into making it smooth and straight. I looked down at the hairdryer with comb attachment and the bottles before me and said “Screw it!” I looked in the mirror and told my hair, “Do you.”

It took a while for it to understand what I meant. I don’t blame my hair at all. First, my mother and sisters and then various hairstylists had been telling it what to do for better than 40 years. Now, it had to find itself. *chuckle* It took awhile but it is coming around nicely. At least I think so. And so do quite a few men.

*chuckle* And they’re nonblack American men. I don’t quite know what to make of that. One in particular is a nice Jewish guy from a nice Jewish family who I am sure will not like me and my natural locks at all. *chuckle* He better stop messing with me before I take him up on his offer and get him disinherited is all I know. *chuckle* But he is fun.

And, I am still looking for a replacement for Raul! *chuckling* Who would think that my coochay would be so picky. *lol* But that is a post for another day and I’m hungry. *smells dinner calling*

Till then… *tips wine glass at monitor*