I love Nip / Tuck and why Kizzy got a bum personal life.

So I got the complete series of Nip/Tuck for Christmas.  I remembered it being a great show.  I watched the first three seasons and half of the fourth season before saying see ya to cable.  Well I’ve finally watched it from beginning to end and wow is all I can say.  It was even better watching it now.

I was talking to my BFL about the show and how I missed so much symbolism when I first watched it over 10 years ago.  Show ran from 2003-2010.  Now that I have some distance and some more age and experience on me, it really blows me away how much story telling and symbolism was in that show.

My BFL and I were dissecting just a couple episodes.  I’ve already done a run through but I started watching it again because my BFL was saying she didn’t believe that Christian even liked women.  And I thought, but didn’t say, much like most Christian religions.  *chuckle* I wasn’t sure I agreed with her or not.  Besides Sean he had no male friends.  If he had no use for a person, male or female, then they were soon dismissed from his life.  And he was pretty unapologetic about it.  Even tied up with an angry ex-girlfriend aiming a knife at his penis he still told the truth.

Kimber: Why couldn’t you just love me?

Christian: I never loved anyone.

That takes guts.  She’d already cut him in the side.  You know she ain’t playing but you’re still telling the truth.  Dang bro’.  *chuckles*

But I find it interesting that they give the character most like the devil the name Christian.  Remember the devil is reported to be a fallen angel and the most beautiful of them all.  Consequently, the most beautiful people on the show have some of the most awful secrets or do the most awful things.  And Christian and his 10-inch penis thought of himself as as the most beautiful of them all.

In the show’s run they handled homosexuality, bestiality, transgenders, fluid sexuality, Christianity, Scientology, of course our obsession with physical perfection, vanity when your eyes is lying azz lying to you, parenting, love, hate, sex, bigotry, fatherhood, motherhood, gender inequality, child abuse and so much more.

There is an episode where they realize, after the fact, that they have changed the appearance of a pedophile priest.  Sean is all for taking their time and talking it out with the Archdiocese.  He’s leaving voicemails and hoping they call him back.  He’s supposed to be the good guy in this.

Meanwhile, Christian goes down to the church and confronts the priest.  Then do you know what that good Christian priest says to him: He knows it is wrong but he can’t help himself and he can’t go to jail either.  Christian, one of a handful of times, shows what being a Christian is supposed to be about and tells him either he turns himself into the police or he’ll do it himself.

You’re supposed to take up for the innocent children already here.  Period.

There were other moments like that in the show.  I’m watching it yet again to pick up stuff I missed.  I had a couple choking moments of course.  They showcased the double standards between men and women.  Sean cheats on his wife and his mistress dies.  He confesses to his wife and then buries his head in her lap looking for sympathy after his mistress dies from cancer.

*blink blink* N*gger WHAT?????

She puts him out for a couple weeks but goes to him and tells him to come home.

Okay.  He finds out that she had an affair with Christian before they were married and that their oldest is in fact Christian’s son.  He tries to kill her before kicking her out of the house and refuses to forgive her for months.  When the divorce is final and she starts a successful business THEN he wants her azz back.  At which point she’s like naw, I’m good but thanks.  He forgives Christian long before forgiving his ex-wife.

The show even took digs at people who believe their kids are going to tell them everything because they are such good buddies.  When Julia finds out their oldest is having sex she can’t believe he didn’t tell her before engaging in sex.  I couldn’t stop laughing.  I can’t believe how people fool themselves into believing that they and their kids are a) like that and b) need to be like that.

The show also took on what happens when you make your child your peer instead of your child.

If it missed anything to touch on I don’t know what it was.  By the finale they had come full circle.  The only difference is that I wanted to put my foot in Matt’s azz.  Otherwise, I was happy where they left everyone.  Darn good show.  Has to be to get me to blog about it.

But it also got me looking at the caucasian woman they were passing around.  I started thinking about Kizzy and the difference between Kizzy and Kimber.  Though Kimber got passed around and ended up doing porn, meth, prostitution, she still got six marriage proposals, four of those rings were worth over $100k, one ring was between $10k - $20k and she got married twice.  But people think you’re overreaching when you say that Kizzy’s romantic life should have been totally different.  Okay.  Y’all keep thinking that.

OH!  I did want to remark on something else that of course happened on fb.  On a writer friend of mine’s wall.  I started to discuss it in my writer group but I didn’t want it to seem like I’m gossiping about her because I’m not.  I’m just concerned.

Here’s the scenario.  Said writer friend is pregnant.  She’s had a miscarriage and then difficulty getting pregnant again.  So now that she is pregnant again she has been gushing.  It is to be expected.  I read what I want and like and skim when I ain’t got time.  Well yesterday she put up a rant about her pregnancy saying that if people didn’t like her pregnancy posts then they could unfollow / unfriend as they pleased.  This was her joy and she was going to revel in it.

I read it and was a bit shocked.  Only a bit because she basically says what she feels all the time.  So I wasn’t surprised at the rant.  I was surprised she told people on her author’s page they could leave if they didn’t like her pregnancy posts.

So, I sat and ruminated for a minute on whether I should say something.  I said a prayer on it and then reached out to her.  I just asked did she think that was wise considering that a lot of the people on her page are her readers.  People planning baby shower participation and ish.  She’d need those folks to buy her books when they come out this year.

She said that she wrote under other names and that she had other ventures that supported her so she felt fine if people didn’t want to support her anymore.  She said she was tired of people telling her she couldn’t do what she wanted to do and she was going to do things her way.

So I was like, okay.  Cool!  As long as you are good financially then I’ll go back to minding my business.  Then I got to thinking, you know the no nonsense approach works for Dr. Phil.  Let me sit here and see how this works out for her.  I always watch how other writers run their pages to see what seems to work for them especially with writers in my same genre.

So today I signed onto fb and fooled around on other people’s pages and my own before going to check her page to see what folks had said to her rant.  People seemed supportive.  I saw that she posted a follow up video detailing what made her go off.  Basically some folks who have access to her told her things from it is too early for her to be talking about her pregnancy to she needs to be sensitive to people who are still trying to get pregnant, etc.

And people seemed to understand and rally around her.  So I kind of breathed a sigh of relief.  However, as I looked around things do seem to be a bit quieter on her wall.  I’m going to keep an eye on it as I said, I look at how other writers seem to connect with their readers as info on how I want to move forward with my readers.  I know one romance writer who has bonded with readers over her cat.  Seriously she gets close to 100 likes and lots of conversation on her cat’s antics every time she posts.  She’s got a great rapport with an awful lot of her readers.  Great rapport with your readers leads to repeat readers and recommendations.

This writer friend of mine had/has that.  Like I said, I’m going to keep an eye on it and see how it goes.

Other than that, things are still great.

Peace, love, and blessings.

I gotta say it somewhere...

Happy New Year!

I know, long time no write.  I’ve been happily busy.  Which is a very good thing.

I only stopped by here because I have to say this somewhere before I bust.  I can’t say this to the person who started the fb post because there would be a war on her wall and it is not that serious.  I can’t say it in my women’s group because the most vocal ones love that tv show that I call Kizzy Does DC (KDDC).  I refuse to mention the show’s real name but it has Kerry W. in the lead role.  They will defend that show to the last drop of their blood.  They’ve already done so and continue to do so just disgusted that they have to keep defending the show.  They defend that show like they are defending themselves.

Look, I like some of Nicki Minaj’s songs and I don’t defend her when people attack her.  I pay for her music to entertain me.  She isn’t giving me a thin coin to defend her and I don’t.  So I figure they must see themselves in Kizzy and are defending themselves. *shrug* The needle on my f*cks to give meter remains at rest.

Anyway the fb post was about a book on amazon listed as interracial erotica.  Now it isn’t actually erotica.  It is pure smut.  Black chick and her strong white man.  But they don’t call the black woman a chick, they use the word Ho or Hoe.  I forget.  Anyway they were all outraged and one wondered who sanctioned this “filth”.

I had to go to bed early, I was asleep before 9 pm, because it was taking everything in me to not type the following:

The people sanctioning what you term as filth are in fact every single person who is in love with the tv show KDDC or as it is formally known _________.  What y’all don’t get while y’all are screaming “Do it Kizzy!” at the tv is that the show feeds into the fetish that a lot of caucasian men (heck and I imagine some caucasian women too) have about black women.  They would love to be able to screw that smart, articulate, accomplished, attractive, composed black woman in their place of employment, gym or wherever absolutely filthy.  Most black women don’t get that there are eyes set in caucasian faces crawling all over them every day that wish they could treat them like a black ho/hoe.  They don’t want to date black women, just use their bodies for sexual gratification.  Oh and they would like it very much if you, black ho/hoe, would love the degrading way they treat you in the bedroom.  Please and thanks.

There is no love between Kizzy and either of the caucasian men that the writers keep passing her back and forth between like a cheap bottle of muscatel.  When this show is off the air and a few years have passed, SOME people will see the show clearly.  Some will still romanticize it.  Kinda like how I feel about Gem and the Holograms. *chuckling*

I realized that black women really didn’t realize why the show was on the air when I saw someone circulating a petition to have them end the affair with Kizzy’s married massa.  I laughed and shook my head knowing that would never happen.  The day it does, the show will be canceled, not finaled, but canceled five episodes later.

That would mean she would be left with the caucasian who is single, I think.  I don’t watch the show.  I just notice from my fb newsfeed who she’s with by who everyone is panting about that week.  She even had a black beaux for a minute, I guess.  One of her caucasian massas either killed him or had him killed.  Don’t know.  Don’t care.  However, left with an unattached caucasian male would mean that they would be dating.  He would treat her like a woman who is his equal instead of the black ho/hoe that he is using for sex while basking in her love as he treats her like a ho/hoe.

Pay attention: THAT AIN’T GOING TO HAPPEN ON THIS SHOW!

That’s not what the show is about for the caucasians who watch it and write it and that is all that matters.  It has even been leaked that when Miz Shonda ends the show, things will end badly for Kizzy.  As it is supposed to.  A jump off isn’t supposed to have a happily ever after.  Look at Alicia Keys.  She got Whiz but she also got to help him pay his child support payments to the baby mommas before, during, and probably after they got married.  She’s a laughing stock as she should be because she was a jump off to a married man.

Kizzy should have just as bad an end. *shrug* And the leaks seem to say Miz Shonda and the caucasians funding the show agree.

Back to my point, every time a black woman/girl extolls this show, in the fetishizing caucasians’ minds that means that there are black women/girls open to being treated like Kizzy right here and now in 2015.  And that boys and girls is why there is this fetish erotica that y’all are calling filth.  This is what called it into being.

Heck, the books that they were discussing on fb have commenters remarking that they made mistakes in the book.  Black women don’t have pink nipples and they kept mixing up blonde and black hair in the same book! LOL In other words, someone took out their manuscript written about caucasians and just redid the female character and made her black.  Then they didn’t do a very good job of editing it on top of it.  LOL

And though they hate it, those books are in the top fifty thousand on amazon.  Why is that notable?  Because amazon has over seven million books on their site.  Some of those books are well known best sellers by authors the masses know and love.  Books that have been made into plays and movies.  And these smutty fetish books are in the top fifty thousand with them.  Not top million or even hundred thousand but fifty.  Yeah.  There is evidently a lot of money to be made in these kinds of smutty books.  And they get sanctioned every time black women sit down and enjoy, tweet, fb, blog, etc about how much they love KDDC.

*sighs*  Okay.  It is out now and I can go back to chill mode.

A fabulous new year to you!  *fingerwaves*

Happy New Year!

*chuckles* Kinda sorta.  I’ve been pretty busy but I did want to swing by and give a quick update on my life.  I got downsized/laid off or whatever you call it in June 2013.  It has been an interesting time in my life full of reflection and refocusing.  I don’t really feel like I can talk about it with the women in my women’s group.  Most of them are atheists and even the ladies who say they believe are still struggling with their faith.  So me and my happy go lucky way of looking at things just don’t quite fit there.  Do I know all the reasons I’ve been going through what I have for the past eight months?  No.  I do feel like one reason was to help me refocus my energy.

I’ve been self-publishing for over a year.  Before June 2013 I was selling 5-10 books a month.  Now I’m selling 100 books a month!  Some months more but at least 100 except at Christmas because well Christmas! Lol  People got gifts to buy but January came around and I’m right back at 100/month.  With just eight months of refocusing my energy.  *blink blink*  That wouldn’t have happened if I had stayed in my previous job surrounded by so much negativity, loneliness, unhappiness, complaining, etc.  There was a lot of negativity that I dealt with from people 40 hours a week.

Yeah I was positive but even I can’t be positive for 125 people.  So I was removed from that situation.  I got to sit home for six months and really work on my stories, re-tweak some that were already published, work on marketing strategies, network and such.  It was a blessing.

When my benefits ran out He sent me a job that I hadn’t even applied for.  It is a temp to perm position but it is paying the bills.  The car got repo’d but hey I’m in great health (PRICELESS), my mind is steady spitting out ideas for new stories so fast I can barely keep up, I’m selling books with minimal marketing on my part, I still have my apartment, food in the fridge, clothes on my back, lights on, heat on, phones plural on, and I live on a regular public transportation route, I got a wonderful supportive family and great real life and online friends.  I’m blessed.

Everyone on fb ain’t doing that well.  Not to mention someone sent this guy my way who I’ve told ever so nicely we are not compatible.  He doesn’t seem to get that.  He thinks he just needs to show me what I’m missing. *pause* I just need a fb break.  I don’t know who sent him my way but they are truly not a friend.  Only reason I friended him in the first place was because we had a few friends in common and they are all people I talk to on a regular. Oh well.

So, I’m doing some growing and I’m learning some new things.  I am just being open to the positive forces around me and trusting in Him.  Me and my BFL had a spa weekend over the summer and we talked about Him removing you from negative situations.  She didn’t get downsized but she did have to move her desk to a new area.  She said she was miffed at first but then was like ‘Hey, I still got a job and they are downsizing around here.  Let me put a smile on, be grateful, and move my desk.’.  She said after she moved she realized it was to a quieter area.  She didn’t have to listen to her coworkers complaining anymore.  The people she is now surrounded by are just as professional as she is.  They come to work, do their jobs, are polite and courteous and take their butts home at the end of the day.  She hadn’t had such peaceful days in years. *smile* She said that’s when she realized why she had been moved.  She needed to get out of the midst of all that negativity and madness.  She said in the area she is in now she can get a lot more work done.  People aren’t constantly trying to get her to listen to their latest drama.

I speak from experience when I say, you listen to that stuff too long you will eventually take that stuff into yourself.

Now I’m moving toward starting my own publishing company JUST FOR MY STUFF! *chuckling* Not looking for clients or anything.  I want to have my books translated into other languages and I found a woman to do so.  But then the woman who is going to translate for me said her boss needs a billing address.  As I was typing up my home address it looked so unprofessional.  That’s one thing I pride myself on is being professional.  So I was like, let me go rent one of those virtual offices.  Then the idea that’s been kicking around in my head popped up again.  Start your own publishing company! *chuckling* Time to incorporate!  That will take more time and I’ve got to redirect money to that so the translations will have to take a back seat for a minute.

It is kinda hard to talk about these things among the group because there are a couple published writers there, too.  I’ve heard a few times they envy me.  I just smile because they have the things I always wanted.  A husband and kids.  My stories are my husband and kids so that’s where my energy flows.  If I were married with kids and a demanding 40-50 hour/week job then that is where my energy would go.  It is all about appreciating what you got and just knowing that there is a different wonderful plan for all of us.

*shrug* That’s how I reconcile it.  Not everyone is in a mind or spirit to do so.  So I just keep to my corner and do my thing.

Here’s to learning and growing!

It's the holiday season...

Happy Holidays!

Welp!  It has been an awesome year!  A lot of great things happening with my stories and I am so encouraged and happy about them.  The direction my life is going in is ever positive and I am just too tickled about it.

The more I focus on the positive and wonderful things in my life truly the better it gets.  I took some time away from my main facebook account.  One of the ladies in our facebook group passed away in October.  It was just really sad signing in knowing she would never be there again.  I took a break to mourn her passing.  While I was gone I threw myself into my writing and am really pleased with the results of all that grieving energy.  I bet she would be too.

So, there I was a couple weeks ago tooling along when one of the ladies from our group asked when I was coming back.  I was thinking about sometime early in the new year but I was told I was missed.  So on my birthday I was taking a break from writing anyway so I went back.  The pain is less but I still miss Ro.

I've been back on my old profile less than two weeks and I don’t see that I've been missed.  And I see I haven’t missed much.  People seem to be doing more complaining and seem to be more unhappy now than when I took my break.  Last thing they need is my positivity.

I know, shouldn't my positivity be a good thing for people to be around?  Not when they ain’t feeling it too.  I know about ten, geez it is hard to believe it was that long ago, years ago I was going through a really rough patch emotionally.  I didn't want to hear about anyone else’s good news or be encouraged back then.

Everyone is on a journey called life.  We all have our paths to walk and lessons to learn.  I've learned the lessons of the younger women in our group already.  And they get snippy if you try to offer some advice. *shrug*  So I think I will spend more time on my author’s page like I’ve been doing and stay out of their hair.

It is really strange to me because not only is my women’s group full of people griping but the writing group too!  Everybody’s venting in one group or another.  I had to turn off the notifications on the writing group.  The woman who started the group has been going through her own personal struggles this year and left a couple other ladies to run it in her absence.

I think what I’ve learned is that if I ever start a group like that, I’ll make sure I can maintain it.  When I can’t, I’ll just shut it down because it really isn’t about writing or books anymore.  People just go in there to vent.  She’s trying to get it back on track.  It is going to take time because she’s been gone most of this year.

My cooking group is still on point though. lol

So I think I’ll stay in my little corner of facebook.  My author’s account doesn’t have anything on it but puppies, kittens, beautiful men and women, scenery, and beautifully decorated rooms.  All stuff I use for inspiration to write.

Keeps me out of trouble and keeps people from snapping at me because they’re unhappy.

Have a safe and happy holiday!

On the death of Trayvon Martin

I’m going to say this and leave it here and move on with my life.  Right now I am on a media blackout.  Everyone is sitting around on fb, twitter, etc lamenting the fact that George Zimmerman got away with murder.  They are right to a point and we let him.  Let me explain how I see it.

The travesty that is the Trayvon Martin case is that black men did not do what they were supposed to do.  Specifically, the black men of my generation.  When the baton was passed to them to continue the struggle they dropped it.  You see, instead of getting married, building strong families, and continuing to build on the political power base that was started in the 60s and 70s, they decided to sow their wild oats.  Some of them are still sowing them well into their 40s, 50s, and so on.  All while blaming black women for the failure of the black family.

I’m not going to get into a finger pointing match of who was supposed to do what.  Black folks have been doing that for a couple decades now and nothing is changing for the better.

One of the men on BA posted an article about the genocide that is going on in Chicago. *shrug* We have the same genocide going on in Baltimore, and other metropolitan cities where economically and socially challenged blacks live. When you have babies instead of building families genocide from within is the result.  And they want us to feel sorry for them. I can’t.  I lived in those same neighborhoods and I fought and clawed my way out.  It is easy to sit back and do nothing.  It is harder to get up and do something besides talk about change.

They, black men, say they want media coverage of what is going on in the black community. Gee whiz, when Tyler Perry does a play about the things that are going on in the black community it is all lies, etc, etc.  His plays put a lot of blame for our problems at black men’s feet.  He doesn’t let black women off scot free either. But see, when you want to be the leader then you actually have to LEAD and not be led.  They want caucasians to lead them to their place as “kings”. *eye rolls* Where in the history of this world is it written that any king was handed his power and kingdom by another mortal king?  Seriously, where? More importantly, why would caucasians do such a thing?  In their eyes it profits them to keep the status quo just as it is.  It doesn’t but that is a post for another day.

What I have learned from studying caucasian history is that the reason they win is because they are tenacious!  They do not stop until their objective is obtained.  Then they find a new objective and keep pushing. Success is not a destination. It is a journey. It is a journey they are in for the long haul.

Hispanics in this country follow in that same vein.  They build families. They build communities. They have built their political power base. I offer the following example: in my great state of Maryland illegal aliens can now get a driver’s license and free healthcare. *blink blink* They pay not one income tax anywhere but they can drive the same roads that US citizens, born and naturalized, pay taxes for the upkeep on. And they can do so legally. They can get free health care and have not paid one dime into social security.  That is what having a community to back you does. You build a community by building families. Parents care about their children and the community they grow up in. They vote. They call their congressmen and senators when there is a community concern.  Baby daddies and baby mommas just sit around talking about how bad things are and when are white folks gonna fix it.

I’m not gonna lament.  I’m going to work for the change I want to see. I’m going to funnel all my emotional energy into what I’m doing for change. I don’t expect the world to change overnight. Only a fool would expect that. Sweety, Columbus sailed the ocean blue sometime around 1492. It took over five hundred years to see a black president of these here united states but we got one. Perseverance, tenacity, hope, imagination, and so much more. And of course, not to forget God. Me and Him got a relationship that is quite different from most. It doesn’t require me judging another soul. Just my own progress in life.

Instead of the folks in Florida lamenting and being angry I offer this, there were at least fifty-eleven (yes that’s a term these days) things that George Zimmerman did wrong that they could be lobbying to make illegal now. Starting from when the 911 operator told him not to engage the young man and that the police were on their way. If you’re angry, sad, mad, depressed, etc then get off your butt and start lobbying for change. Start lobbying for a new law. Contribute that dollar you were saving till the end of the month to Trayvon Martin’s parents’ defense fund for a civil suit. Every action counts.

If you don’t like the war young black men are waging on each other in your city then I suggest you stop complaining about it and be about it. Be a mentor or be a victim. Because I assure you, Shaquan and ‘nem are coming for you one day if you don’t. Get back to teaching young black men to be men and leaders instead of baby daddies. Forget the finger pointing of who did what to who when. It doesn’t help. Each day new children are born and they need guidance to be better than the streets where they were born.

If you don’t like what is going on in your world then shut up, get up, and do something about it. I ain’t saying you got to change the whole world with your one idea, dollar, action, phone call, letter, etc. But if each person did what they were able to do to work towards a positive change think of what we could accomplish. I think of it this way: the United States of America started with a couple ships and look at her now.

*shrugs* Be the change or be the problem. I’m working on my way of being the change. No tears here. No cussing or fussing either. That is wasted energy that takes away from my work on the solution.

As for George Zimmerman?  He will spend the rest of his life looking over his shoulder. Thanks to the news media, we know what he looks like fat and skinny. I predict one day we’ll hear that he is dead. Whether by his own hand or someone else’s I can neither say nor really care. He sealed his fate when he shot down another human being for no discernible reason.  I leave him in the hands of the God I serve. He’s merciful but He is vengeful, too.

My condolences go to Trayvon Martin’s family. May they find a way to heal despite this travesty.  I hope they seek a civil trial. I hope we all stand behind them and send them a million dollars or more for the legal dream team they need to win.

I hope that black folks wake up, stop blaming, and get moving.

*heads off to lunch*

Why are they trying me?

*pissed face*

I have been doing so well.  I really have.  I’ve been positive and upbeat.  Things have been going so well for me lately that I have just been feeling so blessed.  The stress has just been missing me left and right.  Today *pauses and looks Heavenward* the devil pulled out all the stops.  He won this round but the war ain’t over.

So I cannot remember whether or not I blogged about my last time eating something one of my coworkers cooked.  It was a few years ago and I did not have a good weekend because of it.  They didn’t kill me then but I swear they keep trying. *nervous chuckle* At least that is what my friends tell me every time I mention that they are having another potluck.

I have taken vacation days to avoid the potlucks.  I have scheduled doctor’s appointments and meetings.  Heck I’ve said I had a meeting and just went and hid out in an empty conference room.

I think I’ve done well in avoiding their cooking.  That is until today.  This time they did a sneak attack.

We celebrate birthdays on the job.  Whoever had the last birthday gets the birthday goodies for the next person.  We have people who like cake or pie or cupcakes, etc.  Whatever the birthday guy or girl would prefer.  Just about everyone bought their offerings at a store or bakery.

But. Not. Today.

Today the coworker hosting the birthday recipient decided she would cook lunch for our team.  They announced it first thing this morning via email telling everyone not to each lunch.  This woman is a very nice woman.  HOW FUGGING EVER!  She has had a cough for YEARS that her doctor can neither diagnose nor cure.  Why the fugg does she think I want her cooking for me?

So I took my medicine about 5 minutes before going into this impromptu luncheon.  I politely explain that the meds I take prevent me from eating for almost an hour.  Everyone nodded and said that’s a shame.  Everyone but CCW2.  This bish gonna ask me what medicine I take.  This bish ain’t a doctor!  And it wasn’t her business.  She was trying to bust on someone!  I told her I couldn’t remember and would have to check the bottle.  Why the fugg do people think it is their business to show people up?  I did the nice polite thing.  What I could have done was the following:

Bish, I ain’t eating from not nan one of y’all.  I have seen two of y’all bishes come out of the bathroom without washing your hands.  One of you trifling bishes had the nerve to stand beside me and PRETEND to wash your hands.  The only reason I caught it was that someone spoke to me as they entered the bathroom.  When I looked up from washing my hands to see who spoke that’s when I caught your nasty azz wiggling your dry azz fingers at the water.  Standing there with this little smirk on your face too!  Then your nasty azz turns off the water with your nasty hands and grabs a paper towel.  The dry towel barely makes it into the trash.  Dry paper don’t fly people.  You just wadded up good before you tossed it.  Then grabbed the handle and walked out the bathroom.  Who would have thought that someone who acts so prissy could be so nasty.  I was in shock when I saw it.

*turn to another coworker*  Then there is your azz!  I saw you run your hands through the water once to the left and then once to the right and turned off the water.  No.  Soap.  Was.  Used.

*look around the room hoping someone will look guilty* Then there is the chick I am trying to catch who uses the bathroom and then exits the bathroom without washing her hands.  I don’t know if it is one or a few of y’all.  I wouldn’t be surprised if there was more than one.  One day someone was in there having the wettest, nastiest sounding BM.  Bish walked out of the bathroom without washing her hands.  OH!  How I wish I could have gotten out of my stall a half a second quicker.  Nasty bish!

*turn and point at another coworker*  Then there is this bish here who scratches her crotch constantly.  CCW2 you keep on eating the food she brings in.  CCW2 your azz stays sick.  Makes you wonder.  Oh and CCW2 you are another one that can’t cook for me the way you stay sick.

That’s just y’all women.

I can’t speak for what goes on in the men’s room but dude in the scarf your hygiene is questionable and you’ve been sick for at least six months.  All last summer you walked around the office with a wool scarf wrapped around your neck.  Our AC ain’t that chilly.  Believe that!  All through the fall and winter you’ve been sniffling.  I thought it was drugs but hey who knows?

Side note: Mr. Wool Scarf cooked this fish dish that everyone insisted I had to try.  So said I had to go to a “meeting”.  *pursed lipped eye roll*  I ain’t got time for tape worms.

CCW2 you got one more time to organize one more gatdamn potluck!  Stop asking these nasty azz people to cook!  Stop cooking and bringing me ish!  ALL THAT SHYT GOES IN THE TRASH WHEN Y’ALL AIN’T LOOKING!!!!!

Not to mention that we are in the middle of cold and flu season.  AGAIN, why the fugg are you trying to organize another potluck that I am not participating in?

Yeah.  That’s what I could have said.  But I didn’t.  I just kept it nice and polite.  She need a fugging hobby, dack or something to keep her mind occupied.  I don’t trust this bish not to be planning to knock off the whole office.

I don’t know what to expect from a bish that patronizes places her daughter wouldn’t be allowed into.  Oh.  CCW2’s daughter is half black.  She remarked about a place she hangs out at that doesn’t allow blacks in 2013.  Her daughter can’t go there unless she is accompanied by her.  *crickets*  Yeah.  But she loves fugging black men.  But she goes places where a black man wouldn’t be allowed.  When someone figures that shyt out put it in a research paper and maybe I’ll read it.  I don’t want shyt from this bish who says she’s a Christian.  Some of these “Christians” gonna have a whole lot of explaining to do.  I hope they got recliners and popcorn in Heaven because I’m gonna be sitting back watching the back peddlers enjoying the show and watching the Lord make them sweat.

I am praying and meditating.  I’m trying to decide if it is time to kick it into bish mode cuz they are trying my patience with this cooking ish!  I should have done what CCW1 did and ate lunch early and showed up at the end.

*stank face while I contemplate what I'm supposed to learn from this*