I have come to the conclusion that young single people are
crazy. No. I am not joking. I don’t know where these people came from or
perhaps it was me that was dropped on this planet from another place. But these
people are seriously crazy.
I was tooling around on fb and saw one of my ebuddies
talking again about how much she misses her ex mini boo. So called because of
his stature. He has friend zoned her. She’s been saying this stuff a while now
so it just hit me that she is serious and that she is in no way, shape or form
even beginning to get over him. That she is just waiting around in the friend
zone waiting for him to change his mind.
*blink blink*
So I made a comment to the post that at first glance didn’t
seem harsh. Then someone else commented back and I saw that perhaps my comment
was a bit harsh. It is just that I have
run out of sympathy for anyone, man or woman, in her situation. I’ve just seen
it too many times. I’ve given the same unfollowed advice too many times. And I’ve
felt the same sympathy too many times.
People have hit me up to support them in these situations
too many times and my relationship sympathy well is low. I believe it is drought
season. I am sincerely all out of f@#ks to give. Let me tell you what is going on…
I was on BA and one of the BA fam was going through it
because she thinks she played herself by having sex with a dude she’s been
communicating with but not dating on her first visit. She thinks she played
herself because she texted him and he didn’t immediately return her texts. It
had been a day. *blink blink*
Another woman texted her man and he didn’t return her text.
It had been 32 minutes. I spend that much time on the toilet some mornings
because I am just having a hard time waking up. *shrug* And the cell phone
doesn’t come with me when I’m in the bathroom so go figure. Then she comes back a few hours later after
their long convo and everything is just fine now. C.R.A.Z.Y.
Then another BA newbie wants advice about some dude who says
he don’t want to date he just wants to chill.
And though all the women chimed in what I was thinking, he just wants to
screw her and be done with it, it still was just *thought pause for the right
word* ugly to see how far down black men’s opinion’s of black women had fallen.
One of the BA men responded that yeah he just wants to f@#k and that in that
guy’s shoes he thinks like thus: tell the girl you just want to chill which
equals screwing. If she says she ain’t down for it then cool but he’s still
gonna try to get her in the bed. If he does then she is done and not worthy of
a relationship with him.
I have no idea if other black men on the internet feel this
way. The few predominantly black male sites
I have lurked on were full of so much hate for black women it was almost a palpable
thing that could reach through the computer monitor to attack you. So I haven’t lurked on those sites in
years. And in a way I guess it does
attack your psyche to know that so many black men with internet access could be
so hateful to their own women.
Then there is the thing with my BFL and her husband. Then
CCW1's husband left again which has her walking around looking all sad in the
face.
My relationship sympathy well is just low. I can only care about sincere
emergencies. And besides my BFL, the
rest are not emergencies. They are ridiculous.
And it isn’t just black folk but I believe the whole
generation of younger folk and a few in my own generation caught up in this
silly game. Everyone wants perfection. A
perfect mate. A perfect relationship. Minimal work. And a perfect life.
Sticking with the black situation, black men believe that
because there are so many more black women than men that that means that they
can wait for the perfect mate. They have
options. What most of them fail to
realize is that if the only thing they do is screw black women over that
eventually there won’t be any good black women left to date/marry. True there
are other women they can date/marry but if they haven’t spent just as much time
building a life as they do playing The Game then most of them won’t be wanted
beyond a screw and if they can’t do that well then they won’t be wanted period. And after a certain age they’ll need a pill
to even get it up.
Like CCW1’s husband for example. Yeah, he’s finding other
women to screw but evidently he isn’t as good at it as CCW1 thinks because so
far no one will take him off her hands for long before they either put him out
or break up with him period. They ain’t trying to let him move in. The married chick he was messing with was
having a ball playing mind games on CCW1’s fb wall until CCW1 told her that she
would tell her husband. Married chick
shut the hell up and that was the end of her.
CCW1’s husband was good to f@#k around with but she wasn’t messing up
her marriage over him.
And there have been other affairs but none of those women
want him for good. *smh* But his dumb azz stays out there trying to find
someone other than CCW1. And her dumb
azz takes him back every time another chick leaves him homeless.
I have a coworker who is an advocate for adoption as she AND
HER HUSBAND adopted two children. Right now black males, even infants, are the
hardest children to find homes for. I went to one of her talks on adoption. She
invited in an agency that had black children waiting and needing to be placed
so badly they were going around holding seminars like Amway. Do you know how sad that is? No one wants
black kids. Not even us.
She tried to talk me into adopting an INFANT a couple years
ago. I just barely kept my professional demeanor
in place. If I had wanted to be a single
parent I wouldn’t have waited until my 40s to have one, first of all. Second,
babies are adorable until they start to deprive you of sleep. I love sleep. I
ain’t giving it up for any little poop factory no matter how cute they are. I may regret that one day but today ain’t
that day.
So black men ain’t as in demand as they think they are. They
keep f@#king over perfectly good women and then wonder why they can’t find a
decent mate. Instead of treating all women they meet with love and respect. If she
ain’t the one for him then let her know and move the hell on. These games always bite everyone in the azz
in the end. Especially black men.
I hear women complaining about hating to date but wanting a
boyfriend/man/husband. *blink blink* I really don’t even know where to start
with that whole sentiment. Seriously. I have no clue what that means nor do I
even begin to understand that concept.
Not to mention that a lot of the younger women want
perfection too: tall, handsome, rich, with well endowed, good in bed, childless,
and generous. *blink blink* Even Prince Charming didn’t have all that. He was
rich, cute and childless. We ain’t heard not nan thing about whether he was
generous or well endowed or good in bed.
Everyone seems to want so much with so little effort.
*slowly shaking my head*
You know, if I had the chance to be a young woman again
right now I wouldn’t take it. These
young folk got too many damn issues and I have run out of f@#ks to give. I am just as content to sit on the sidelines
and watch. I ain’t even entertained anymore. It is just ridiculous at this
point.
*walks away apathetically*
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