However, it is not up to Caucasian Americans to do that for us. It is up to us and we have more than enough wealth within our communities to do so.
Like why does Sean "Puffy/Diddy/P.Diddy" Combs have luxury cars for every day of the week when there are young black students who could become the scientists to work on our health problems who don't have enough money to complete their doctoral degrees without getting school loans up the ying yang that they'll still be paying off when their first grandchild is born?
Why pick on Mr. Combs? Well, in his rap You Can Hate Me Now, he talks about living Bill Gates' dreams. Well Mr. Gates is in the business of giving away most of his wealth before he dies. He just recently fell out of the wealthiest man in the USA spot and that was his goal. He gives money to fund specific projects in underprivileged countries. Because of the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation, polio has almost been completely eradicated in India. Last year the whole country only had one reported case. That is something he can be proud of. When he stands before God, he can show what he did with the much that God gave him.
Mr. Combs can show God his luxury cars. And black men wonder why people don't respect or take them seriously.
Black America is its own underprivileged country. Yet with all the wealth that our black American men control, because there aren't that many black female millionaires let alone billionaires, they spend more on luxury then in trying to further they own communities. Heck you can't get most of them to pay child support. I could but won't list all the black American pro-athletes and entertainers living the high life who are not paying their child support. Instead of them being ashamed of that fact they want you to feel sorry for them because they never wanted the child in the first place.
Unless she raped you I ain't trying to hear it. Yes it is possible for a woman to rape a man. So far not one man has claimed rape. They all went in with their eyes wide open and penis uncovered.
I am watching black American men chase sex, not love just sex, like men in other cultures chase paper. And by paper I mean money, of course, but awards and recognition come on paper, degrees come on paper, deeds to land come on paper, the woman of their heart comes with a marriage license written on paper. I'm watching men of other cultures chase things of real worth. Consequently their lives and cultures and futures look so much brighter and better than our own here in the black American community.
I have seen Caucasian America try to communicate to black American men that they are failing. I am watching black American men continue to say it is all black American women's fault for giving up the sex, that they want so desperately that they lie for it, too easy. They say that if we black American women didn't fall for their lies and put up with their nonsense in hopes of gaining the love of a black American man then they would be better men.
The moment you lie to gain another person's trust so that you can take advantage of them puts the majority of the onus on you for whatever becomes of that person or happens to that person. There comes a time when even we have to accept some responsibility for our actions ladies. When you catch him in a lie, no matter how much you love this man, you have to leave and do not look back. If a person never has consequences for their bad behavior then they never change.
No one believes the BS that black American men are spewing outside of the black American community. In many different ways, if you are paying attention, the world is telling us this black American women. They know us to be a victim but we don't have to remain their victims. I think it is up to each of us how we live our lives.
We can cry and whine and beg and plead for their love. We can change ourselves in every way that today's plastic surgeons and make up counters can change us. We can give up the goods when they say. We can crawl, lie, steal, cheat, and fight for their love.
Or, just maybe we can just learn to first like and then love ourselves. Maybe we can decide that anything we have to demean ourselves for in order to attain it just isn't worth it.
I don't have to crawl on my belly for my own love. I don't have to crawl for God's love. To quote Howard Hewett:
See, you don't have to beg or crawl
He can see you standin' proud and tall
He'll give His everlasting love
Just come to Him as you are ~ Say Amen
Just like I am. Straight hair, kinky hair, no hair. Small nose, big nose, medium sized nose. Tall, short. Fat, skinny and everything in between. Light bright and dang near white or blacker than the darkest night. He still loves you. It does not matter what you look like or have or don't have, God loves you just as you are. Through Him, NOT RELIGION, I have learned how to like and love me just the way I am and it shows. Not to say that religion was not a part of my path to Him. There just came a time when I left religion behind in my search for a better understanding of and relationship with Him.
I cannot and will not lie to myself or the world about black American men. The truth about them is really easy to see. I've tried talking to quite a few of them through different websites and even face to face with no success. Some where along the way they decided that what they wanted to do, no matter how detrimental it was to the black American community, was what they were going to do and either we black American women could get on board or be left alone and lonely.
I will not allow them to define me, my femininity, or my life. Consequently, I am not alone nor am I lonely. Since I stopped letting black American men define me I've been living a fuller more contented life. The only issues I have had are with people who neither understand me nor want to try to understand me.
Last night, I took a swing by my fb women's group to find the younguns crying and whining about being single again and decided to pop in a dvd instead. I tried explaining to them what they needed to focus on a couple times and they are still singing the same sad song. I decided to do what the other women around my age do, shut up and do something else.
So I popped in one of my favorite dvds Last Holiday starring Queen Latifah and LL Cool J. There is a part in the movie where she is in the presidential suite of this grand luxury hotel and she is in the bed just rubbing all against the expensive sheets and smiling and happy. I was like girl, I know how you feel. I started rolling around in my freshly changed bed reveling in the April freshness that is Downy just as content as I could be. I had just taken those sheets, pillowcases, blankets and even my night clothes from the dryer not 5 hours ago. Neither she nor I had a man in our beds and we were just as content as could be.
When you are happy with you and where you are in life, whether or not you have a man will not be your joy. Your joy will just be in living and enjoying the moment and knowing how blessed you are.
My blessings: I had two parents who loved me. No my daddy didn't marry my mother but he loved me enough to give me his Cherokee mother's name and it is a term of endearment when you know the translation. I know I had the most awesome and loving and protective and fantastic and smart and wise woman as my mother. I know I had/have 3 sisters who adore me no matter how much we get on each other's nerves. I know I have limbs that have worked from birth, I was born with a full bush of hair that has thinned somewhat from not caring for it right but it is still here. I know I can hear and I can see and I can sing and I even have rhythm. I love to laugh and do so often with people and even at myself from time to time because I am a funny woman. I can get joy just from the turning of the leaves spring, summer, and fall. I have a favorite shade of blue sky. I love animals and kids and they love me. I have met so many wonderful people that I can appreciate each in turn for what they brought to my life and even took away. I can appreciate what they took and why.
I have so many more blessings. It is why I could roll around in my bed alone smiling and content with not another soul in that bed but me. And despite what anyone else says, there wasn't a doggone thing wrong or selfish about it.
If God had wanted me to have a man there with me, and He keeps telling me He does, then I would have had one. We are on each other's path. *chuckle* I just have to come to terms with a few things first. He ain't through we me yet.
All that to say: Ppppppphhhhhhhhhhtttttttttttt to the BS that black American men are spouting. Life is hard for every body on the face of this planet. No one's cross is any harder to bear than anyone else's. If black American men think life for them is hard in the USA then they should try being a one legged prostitute anywhere on the face of the planet.
Quite frankly, if black American men want to see positive images of themselves then they are going to have to stop throwing stacks at strippers and invest in movies by the few black writers and producers around. They are going to have to fund scholarships for young black people who want to get into the movie/television industry. And they are going to have to stop worshiping at the altar of these simpletons who get a few stacks from rapping and don't try to spin it into long term wealth.
Quite frankly, if black American men want to see positive images of themselves in cartoons, animated movies, and comics then they are going to have to go into the ghettos and find these talented young street artists that draw graffiti that takes your breath away because it is art that should be seen in a gallery and not on the side of a building where it will be whitewashed away as junk. They are going to have sponsor these young artists in galleries and shows and expect no profit in return other than helping their black American community to move another step forward.
Quite frankly, if black American men want to be taken seriously by anyone they are going to have to stop chasing sex, stop promoting that every woman of every other culture but their own is beautiful and worthy to be showered with their wealth, and start chasing the things that matter in this life. The things that last and make contributions to the next generation of black American communities.
Chasing sex contributes to unwanted pregnancies, STDs/STIs, destruction of families, mental illness, poverty, neglect, loneliness, and death.
And not a single man of any culture on this planet has been able to succeed without their queen made in their own image beside them.
I have often wondered what black American men discussed at the last million man march because the black American community seems to be falling apart. I have often wondered if that was on their agenda at all. I am beginning to see a world where we no longer exist. We will be footnotes in history. A few pages and some dusty tomes that will serve as a warning of what happens when you forsake your duty to your people and future generations to chase after carnal gratification and nothing more.
If you pay close attention, my beautiful, strong, vibrant, black American sisters, you will see that though black American men blame us for their weaknesses, missteps, and failures, many many others do not.
It is really quite simple, the majority of the black American women that I grew up with and were raised by were and are good, virtuous, and hardworking women who loved/love their black American men. When the black American man changed his mind about what he wanted in a woman we did everything we could to accommodate him from colored contacts, to weaves, fad diets, spanx, skin bleaching, etc. The list goes on.
Look at Lil Kim. That girl was beautiful when she hit the scene.
Now she looks like some caricature of a Caucasian-esque woman.
I am going to mourn now for the future that we are missing out on. I'm going to pray for a change in black American men's hearts. Then I'm going to get up and be the best woman I can possibly be so that I can stand before God with something added to all that He has blessed me with. He gives a lot but He expects a hefty return. Not so much for Himself because all things belong to Him but for the betterment of mankind.
"For unto whomsoever much is given, of him shall be much required: and to whom men have committed much, of him they will ask the more." Luke 12:48
"Every tree that bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire." Matthew 7:19
Black American men can blame Caucasians for a lot but from this point in time forward, what does or does not become of us is completely on them. If they keep chasing foolishness and carnal pleasure they will condemn us all to extinction.
If they can be the men they profess themselves to be, put away their penises, and start building a better tomorrow then there is an awesome future ahead for all of us.
It is so simple. I pray that they wake up before it is too late. I pray it isn't already too late.
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